Saturday, April 9, 2016

April 9, 2016: The Weekend Manager

The Weekend Manager

What Everybody will be Watching

One of the four times a year we act like we care about golf

The Masters, objectively and subjectively the best golf tournament of the calendar year, will be dominating the sports weekend. Defending champ Jordan Spieth has now leads the tournament four six straight rounds, which is pretty dang impressive. He’ll be paired with Rory McIlroy in Round 3, which is network TV’s wet dream. Speaking of, TV coverage moves to CBS tomorrow, but doesn’t start until 3:30 pm because the Masters have archaic opinions about how much of their product we’re allowed to consume. But I digress. It’s the biggest golf tournament of the year. There are always interesting storylines. It’s the most beautiful thing that will be on your TV all year. And we get to hear Jim Nantz at his best, not smothered under Phil Simms muttering nonsense about football.

The NHL playoff field will be decided

The West is already set, as far as which eight teams will be in the field. In the East, three teams are fighting for two spots. Or, more accurately, two teams are fighting for one spot, and those two teams and another are fighting for the other spot. Confused enough? The Red Wings control their own destiny, and so do the Flyers. The Bruins need to win and have one of the other suffer a loss. The Wings (at NY Rangers) and Bruins (home vs. Ottawa Senators) are up first at 12:30 p.m. today, while the Flyers play at home against Pittsburgh today and at the NY Islanders Sunday.

Will the Warriors chase 73?

Warriors coach Steve Kerr has publicly spoke about wanting to rest his guys down the stretch as the top seed in the playoffs is secured. But with three games left, history is still a possibility. Golden State travels to Memphis tonight, San Antonio Sunday and at home against Memphis Wednesday. “Just go for 73” -- non-Warriors fans, and some Warriors fans, everywhere.

Things to Read this Weekend

The most interesting man in golf

Well, if we’re being totally honest . . . it’s this guy.



But, amatuer Bryson DeChambeau, a Physics major at SMU, is the most fascinating golfer out there. Here is some evidence: He calculates slope to help read greens, Phil Mickelson picks his brain about the science of golf and he’s casually top ten after two rounds in the Masters while playing with irons that are all the same length in an effort to create a repeatable swing plane. Nobody--literally nobody--plays golf with irons that are the same length. Dan Wetzel’s profile of him is amazing and a must-read before golf starts tomorrow.

Speaking of most interesting men

Jaromir Jagr is still playing and is amazingly still amazing. When thinking about how incredible Jagr’s career has been, I immediately go to the fact he was a superstar on a Sega game, and is now a superstar on a PS4 game.

Someone call Maury Povich

Tyler Summitt, you are NOT the father! Because she’s not pregnant. Yes, the Louisiana Tech women’s basketball program is a trashy afternoon talk show.

Headlines




Best of the Rest

[Loud rap music air-horn] PISTONS IN THE PLAYOFFS

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[watches Kobe Bryant attempt layup] [Realizes Father Time catches us all] [cues up Simon and Garfunkel]

Hello Darkness my old friend

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Allen Iverson is the greatest

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(but seriously, PR man, the dude got elected to the Hall of Fame two days ago. Maybe let him dictate his interview)

Pitching next to a snow man . . . that’s Puuuure Michigan.

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Russell Wilson is just the worst.

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Please help this bad quarterback

First, they start a petition. Next, it will be a GoFundMe. Either way, Tim Tebow remains a free agent at this time.

Scoreboards we didn’t create


NHL

THERE WAS ONE GAME: The Blue Jackets beat the Sabres 4-1.


Approximately 74 games were played yesterday. Your favorite team definitely won and your rivals definitely lost. In fact, I’d say your team is a sure bet to make the playoffs after playing 158 more games. Your rivals have no chance.

VERY PARTIAL MASTERS SCOREBOARD

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